Sorry Mommy…

Little Ellia cried in the small corner of her room. Her Mother screaching comands. “CLEAN THE WHOLE HOUSE! YOU WORTHLESS SNOT AND HURRY BEFORE I GET EVEN MORE…” Her mother went on and on about how Ellia was now 8 and needed to do more chores and be responsible. Ellia always thought,” What does my mother know about responsibility all she does is drink and gamble!” She sobbed in the corner. “ELLIA I SAID NOW!” Ellia’s mother screamed. Ellia slowly rised. She walked out the door past her mother and went to the cleaning closet. She grabed her cleaning things and started cleaning.
“Ellia im leaving to the club be good or i will lock you in your room with no supper and you’ll have bruises all over on your worthless little body!” Ellia’s mother Yelled as she slamed the door. When Ellia finally finished cleaning the whole house she sat at the table nibbling on a slice of bread and reading the news paper. For a child she was a great reader and writer. She never been to school. She only had the books her father sent her from Ireland. She was thinking she had enough with her mother. If her mother died wouldnt she be alowed to live with him in Ireland? Yes! She thought how could she… How could her mother be killed… For 8 Ellia was very adult like and had the mind of a 15 year old. “Her moher would ‘commit suicide'” she thought. Yes! Perfect. Ellia ran out of the dining room and to the kitchen. She thought… “No way can i have my finger prints on the Murder weapon!” So she went to the closet and grabbed her mothers black gloves. She slipped them on. “They are a little big but they will do!” She giggled. She grabed a knife from the kitchen and waited at the front door. Her mother was a small woman, and Ellia was a tall and strong young girl. Ellia beleived she could take her. She saw her mothers car pull up. She hid and waited for her mother to walk in. “IM HOME STUPID BRAT!” Ellia’s mother shouted. The mother took i few steps in and shut the door behind her. She sat on the couch. Ellia sprung from her hiding spot and stabed her mother in the chest. “This is for the mean words!” Ellia said stabbing her once. Her mother still breathing but to weak to move. “This is for the beatings and torchure!” She said stabbing her again. She cried as she watched the blood flow out of her mothers chest. She put the knife in her mothers hands. She relized she just killed her mother. “Oh,no…” She cried. She remember the times before her dad left when her mother was kind. “Oh,no. Im sorry mommy…” She wispered. Ellia walked into the kitchen and picked up the home line. She dialled 911. “Hello 911 whats your imergence?” Said the operator. “Yes um… I killed my mother and im about to kill myself… I live on 23st, memorial lane 2208. Please tell my daddy im sorry and i love him… And i loved his gift from my 8th birthday.” Ellie said. “Wait dear please dont-” the operator said. But Ellia hung up. Ellia grabed a knife. Tears streaming down her little face. She stabbed her self right in the neck. She through the knife away. She suffered till she bleed to death.

  • TheRealMrSmile

    I have to say, this pasta was decent at best. The spelling was off, the capitalisation was off, and the grammar was that of a 8 year old’s, and that’s being generous. Take my criticism not as an insult, but a lesson for future reference. Mediocre pasta.

    • Haylee

      I completely agree with you. The author breeds to work on grammar and everything. But the basis is pretty decent.

  • Sksksj

    This is bad
    Very VERY bad

  • Shelby Coppotelli

    Terrible grammar and spelling…..Just sad not scary

  • Suicide Sadie

    That’s just sad bro

  • Da Awesome Man (YT)

    I may have cried…a lot

  • Ms. Ray

    The story was decent and I didn’t even notice the spelling errors. I just thought some parts of the story weren’t realistic. No 8 yr old thinks like that. Maybe you should have made her a little older. And the story wasn’t scary it was just very tragic. Overall the story is good just needs some improvement. 3/5 stars

  • ∆_R.H_∆

    This is an awesome story. Maybe you could write about what happened before the mother died and how she became nice to abusing her daughter

  • Mcswagger

    This story has masssssive potential. Try developing the characters and maybe not have such a quick ending. Grammar was poor I must say. But overall has potential. Like ypu couldve spoke like ten years later when she’s 19 her mother starts haunting her in horrific ways! Good pasta though!

    • Netor Ananab

      If you had read the whole thing, she committed suicide at the end, I think.

  • Simon

    Well, that was atleast slightly more sophisticated than an average “X the Killer” pasta. Too bad it had the grammar and the “realism” of one.