I can’t tell you my name for I have forgotten it, I can’t tell you how old I am now, I can’t tell you the name of the man and woman who were my parents. What I can tell you is my story of how I became what I am today. How my “loving” mother never shown me the love all mothers show their children. How my “dear” father abused me and used me for one of his sick “games.” Then how both of them sent me to the asylum when I was just a little boy because I wasn’t like the other children. To be abused and tested on by those damn cruel doctors and hateful nurses!
The first day at the asylum I was tied down to a table, the head doctor stood over me with an evil grin, I can’t remember what was said but they held my eyes open as they dropped a weird liquid into them, I screamed, I howled, the burning pain… I couldn’t bear it, but the testing and pain never stopped, each day was something new, but they always dropped the burning liquid into my eyes.
Over time I saw my eyes changing I don’t even remember what color they were before they turned a deep dark black, the doctors were happy to see the changes. They shaved my head so they can do tests on my brain, they stopped putting that liquid into my eyes, but when I cry in pain my tears were black, my eyes never changed back, and my hair never grew back.
Year after year more tests, more pain, more abuse I couldn’t take it, I wanted it to end.
A nurse that loved to make fools out of the other sick patients but I was her target more than the others. I couldn’t eat without her taking the little food that they gave us. I couldn’t sleep without her haunting my dreams. I couldn’t speak without her hitting me. I couldn’t even breathe around her, the day I had enough of her is why my mouth is the way it is. You should have heard her screams. It was like music to my ears mixed with the sounds of her gurgling on her own blood, the perfect harmony! Ripping her flash from her throat with my teeth, the taste of her blood flowing down my throat, I’ll never forget it!
When they pulled me off of that nurse, I was laughing, swallowing what was left of her blood in my mouth as some of the warm thick liquid drips off my chin. The head doctor and the others held me down I was still laughing as they sewed my mouth together, I was so used to the pain from the testing, I even started to like it, the stitches oh how I loved them, just opening my mouth the pain, so much pain! I loved it!
Sewing my mouth wasn’t the last punishment they had for me, they threw me into a room with no windows just a metal door once closed. It was nothing but darkness.
I forgot how long I was in there, but my skin turned a pale white. My nails started to grow long and sharp. They even turned black. I still loved opening my mouth making my stitches stretch to pull the skin but soon the pain went away. So, I started to bite my lips until they were gone and I was left with nothing but the darkness!
I remember the metal door opening. I remember a nurse and doctor coming in, more testing, more pain, more hate. The nurse screamed when she saw me. The doctor dropped his clipboard. I was smiling to make the stitches pull my skin, they backed away but were too slow to get away. The screams of both, again music to my ears, their warm blood on my skin, I loved it. I LOVED IT!
One by one, doctors, nurses, even patients, their blood painted the white walls of the asylum or stained my body. When stepping out of the front doors, the cold air felt so odd, but I did miss it so.
Ever since that day the love of killing never went away, my body never went back to normal, and the desire for pain was still there, I was a monster! And I loved it!
But, there was one person who didn’t see me as a monster, she didn’t fear me, she didn’t hate me, she loved me… she made me feel human something I never felt in so long…
When she was killed, I was lost! I couldn’t save her! I couldn’t let her go! I couldn’t forget her! Every time I kill a real monster, I hear her saying she loves me. She haunts me worse than the nurses and doctors!
But I kill the real monsters for her, yes, I broke our promise, but the real monsters’ death is for her! I do it to hear her voice, to have the feeling of her being here with me! I want her back!