This is the story of the girl from “Who’s the Real Monster?”
(Author’s note: this story describes the past of one of the characters from my other story, “Who’s the Real Monster?” If you have not read that story, I suggest doing so before reading this story. Remember that I enjoy other people’s thoughts on my work, so don’t be afraid to comment.)
I’m no Angel, and I’m no saint. However, I was once innocent. Nothing but a defenseless child. My happiness was stolen from me, for no reason. For a crime I couldn’t help committing. Evil claimed me. I lost my sense of common decency, my innocence, my sanity. I’ve heard others adress me as “monster”, but I don’t know if I really am one. Is it me or someone else? Did I commit a crime? Is this all my fault? I don’t know…where did it begin, when did I loose my innocence?
My name is Kita. I am the girl who is a possible monster. This is the answer to my own question; how I became the monster.
5 years old
I’m confused, as usual.
I just got back from visiting my best friend, Yuka, and I was able to meet her father.
He was so kind! He gave me five dollars and didn’t even insult or hurt me in any way! Is this how all father’s are supposed to be? But…then why is mine the exact opposite?
Sure, he looks nice and average. Nice clothes, perfect skin, tidy brown hair, brown eyes – but underneath that shell of perfection was a beast. A monster
Don’t believe me? Here’s an example of my father’s behavior:
I got back a little later than usual, due to the rain, so I get a punishment.
Then there’s what happened on the walk home.
I was minding my own business, when I accidentally ran into a strange man. I couldn’t see all of his face from underneath the hood of his dark red cloak, but the small portion of his face -anything below the nose- that was showing revealed that his skin was an unusual white, and the wrinkles indicated that he was pretty old.
I apologized for bumping into him, then continued walking. However, I was stopped by him after taking only two steps.
I looked into the shadows that were concealing his eyes, then asked for him to leave me alone. His response confused me.
“You’re a special child, aren’t you, Kita?”
“H-How do you know my name?”
“My master told me. He has been watching you for a while, now.”
“Who has? Why is someone interested in me, of all people?”
“You don’t know this yet, but you are even more gifted than you think, little one. Your abilities have indeed interested my master -which is why I am here.”
He reached into the pocket of his cloak, and pulled out a necklace. Attached to the black wire was a smooth, rounded piece of engraved stone.
“He asked me to give you this. It is a present – one as special as you.”
Of course I took the charm, what was I supposed to do?
When my dad saw it he added onto the punishment: five hits with the crop, then locked in the closet until he decided when I could come out. Sometimes it was half an hour, and it once was an entire day and night.
It’s so dark in here…I’m scared. No, I’m terrified of the dark. I don’t know what’s in here, and when I’m in the dark, my dad seems to spot me easier than in light. It’s like he has the eyes of a cat – the dark is no problem.
Yet, there’s nothing I can do. I have to suffer in silence and blackness until my sentence in this prison is over.
7 years old
It’s Christmas season, but there’s even less joy than usual – and there’s usually no joy at all.
The one thing that made me happy was Kota. Sure, my uncle didn’t look as nice as my dad – scrawny; messy red-brown hair; piercing green eyes; tattered clothes; and pale skin – but Kota’s behavior, compared to my dad’s, was as opposite as their looks. Kota pretty much became a father to me, since my real one was a b*****d.
That month, I begged my dad to allow me to go with Kota to his other house in California, for Christmas, but he just threw – yes, literally threw me – into the closet.
It’s darker in winter…it’s scarier.
It’s been getting worse, too. At first, it was just small animals scurrying, but now I hear stranger things. Creaks and moans that are unexplainable.
Now, as I sit in the dark – shaking from fear, while softly and silently crying – I think about what’s going to happen to me.
I heard the strange sound.
It’s as unexplainable as ever, because this is the sound I’ve been hearing for the last few months. I feel like there’s someone there…watching from the shadows. It’s eyes piercing into my mind as I sat with it.
The thought always makes my mind and heart stop, because I can’t see in here, so I don’t know who’s there – or if anyone’s there at all.
Maybe I’m finally going insane.
I’m not surprised. From this kind of torture, it’s hard to keep any hope.
However, I know I’m not crazy, and I know there’s something to live for, because Kota is currently trying to convince dad to let me out.
In other words, there’s something to pull me from the dark; from insanity and whatever creatures taunt me in the shadows.
12 years old
I still haven’t heard from the strange man in the dark red cloak. I’ve tried searching for him, but no luck.
Anyways, I’m in the corner of the living room – where I’m concealed by a couch on my left, and a side table on my right. I like hiding here, because there’s still light, preventing darkness from surrounding me.
Kota and dad got into a fight, because Kota learned about what dad did to me. An unspeakable act, that I blush to mention.
Dad was angry, as usual, but Kota…he looked like he could kill someone, but it wasn’t in his nature to use any form of violence, so I just expected the argument to keep going until either dad or Kota left, indicating that the argument was over.
However, the loud and deadly debate wasn’t ending. I kept cowering in the corner as the argument became far worse. They began yelling and screaming, even louder than usual. There was so much anger emanating from them that I could feel it in the air, causing a suffocating and muscle-stiffening fear from the tension.
I wanted to run, but I felt like I was in a trance. I couldn’t even move my hand to my face, to remove the black hair from blocking my golden eyes. Now I was blinded and scared out of my mind. My heavy breaths became deafening to me, and all I could hear was the screaming, but I couldn’t make out what they were saying.
Through my black hair, I could see the two of them, getting more and more hostile.
Then, I could feel my lungs and heart stop, when I saw dad forming a fist, and raising it. He kept yelling, louder and louder, then the fist hit Kota – causing me to let out a small scream.
Dad’s hit struck Kota across the side of the face, causing a large gash in the left side of his mouth.
Kota’s expression turned from angry to shocked, and even a little frightened. His eyes were dilated and he turned awfully pale as blood ran from the wound.
He attempted to speak.
“Shut up! If you decide to defend that little b***h, then f**k you, b*****d!”
Dad picked up a vase that was on the coffee table, then threw it at me. It broke just above my head, and some of the glass shards sank into my flesh.
“F**k you all!”
He stormed out the front door, slamming it shut behind him.
I realized the vase had hit the lamp I used to light up the area, causing the corner to become dark. As my senses returned, I began hearing the moaning, but this time, they had turned into whispers.
I adjusted the lamp, making the light return and sounds disappear.
All I saw was Kota. Stuck in the position from the attack, and the same mix of fear and shock appeared on both of our faces.
14 years old
I’m in the closet again, but I’ve been keeping a flashlight concealed on me, so that I can keep the noises from happening.
I’m still terrified, though.
The whispers still happen, they’re just quieter. But I can never see anything.
Since I’ve been doing more things that I’m not allowed to do – such as running out of the closet after feeling someone grab me – I’ve been locked in, with dad standing guard.
No, no, no, no, no!
My flashlight stopped working, and I couldn’t see anything, and the whispers grew louder.
“No…….p-p-please, give me light.”
My heart pounded in my chest and my breaths grew heavy.
Dad pounded on the door. “Shut up, b***h, or it’s five hits with the crop!”
Suddenly, everything grew silent.
I couldn’t see anything, not the silhouettes of the items stored in the closet, or the light coming from under the door.
“What’s going on?” I whispered.
A low growl shook my train of thought, tempting me to scream.
“…….I can sense your fear……..tell me, little one, why are you so afraid?….”
The voice was low and sounded evil, but it comforted me, somehow, as if the speaker was someone I could trust.
“I-I’m locked in the darkness.”
The brutal voice replied, accompanied by small growls.
“….and why is that so bad?”
“I can’t see, and there’s something in here – something bad.”
“…….are you positive that it’s something bad?…..After all, isn’t the real monster out there?…..waiting to punish you for the moment you so much as breathe too loudly…..”
“…..well, little one, there is a way to stop this all……there will still be some suffering, but you will get vengeance on he who has tortured you…..”
“What? How do I do this?!”
“……you need three things to undergo this transformation……..”
“Transformation? I thought you said vengeance, not a makeover!”
“………trust goes both ways, little one…….do you wish to continue on the path you’re on, or do you want to attempt to change this?…..”
I sat in thought. He had a point, after all. If I continued letting Korato do this to me, then I’d be suffering for a very long time, and with the amount of violence he’s been using, I’d be dead before I reached age 16.
“Alright, what do I need?”
“……….you were born with one of them…..a special thing that very , very few have……The ability to manipulate the dark……to use shadows as a fuel and as a weapon…..”
“How do you know I even have this ‘gift’?”
“…….those with the rare ability are marked……..your mark is your golden eyes…..they represent your rare ability…….that is exactly why no matter what you try, you can never hide them…….unless they’re in the dark……..”
“Then what are the other two things I need?”
“……..you gained the second one many, many years ago……when you were even more little…….The demon’s seal…..while it is around your neck, it uses your ability to connect you to the dark world……..and allows your ability to become active……”
“I know where the seal is. What’s the last thing?”
“……..a contract……..with the demon lord who is represented by that seal…….this contract will mean that your soul belongs to the dark lord……..it is a large sacrifice, to you humans……..however, this sacrifice is something that most would see as worthy……..especially for someone in your situation……….”
I was about to say yes on the spot – no questions asked.
However, Kota’s words sparked in my head.
“Please, listen to me, Kita. You need to be patient with Korato. He really is a good person, it’s just…..The loss of your mother was such a big impact on him…this act that he has going is temporary, all you have to do is support the good side of him, and he’ll come through. I promise.”
With Kota’s words in mind, I gave my answer.
“I……I need to think this over. Can you please give me time to decide?”
“…………I will give you as much time as you need – be it seconds or decades……….when you wish to speak to me, all you must do is go into the dark and mutter my name whilst holding the seal………”
Suddenly, the complete darkness began fading. I could see the silhouettes of the items in the closet and the faint light coming from the cracks in the door.
Instinct caused me to whisper my words, again. “Wait, what’s your name?”
“Hey!” I heard dad banging on the door and yelling at me. “Shut up or that’s strike three!”
I closed my mouth and bit my tongue.
I was surprised to hear, for once, that the voices were silent.
Deep in thought, I shoved the flashlight away, debating on getting the demon’s seal…..
16 years old
My dad is still a b*****d.
I would seal the deal and make him suffer, but something was preventing me from doing it.
I think it’s Kota. His patience with Korato just proves that whatever he sees in that heartless man is worth the suffering. I still don’t see it, but if Kota knows that it’s worth fighting for, then I’ll trust him.
That’s what I’ve been telling myself, but I think it may change by the end of the night.
Dad and Kota are fighting again. It’s intense, because dad did another unmentionable act to me.
I sat in my lit up corner again, waiting for dad to storm off or for Kota to tell him to get out.
I adapted to the yelling and the waves of anger that emanated from the two brothers. I still worried a little, but I just lost interest of listening to any of it.
But I knew that I had to listen, when I saw dad reach into his coat, and pull out a desert eagle – a very strong pistol.
Kota’s eyes became full of terror, and he passively raised his hands, in an attempt to tell dad to calm down. I listened in as well, coming out of my trance and worrying for Kota’s life.
“Korato, please…..put down the gun.”
“This isn’t you – none of this is you.”
“This is what that little b***h has made me become. If I’m a monster, then she is an evil that not even Satan himself could compare to.”
“Kita didn’t do anything. What happened wasn’t her fault, she couldn’t have done it.”
“B******t. She did it somehow, I don’t know how she did it, but she did. Leeyah is dead. Kita killed her.”
“What happened was natural. She died of a natural cause. You turning into a murderer is not natural.”
“Sure it is. I’ve had the one I love taken from me, and now my own brother has betrayed me. I’m going to kill you, Kota, but first I want to know. Why do you support her? And I want you to tell the truth.”
I stopped listening. I knew what I had to do.
I quietly snuck around the room, to the stairs.
Then, ran to the end of the hall and into my closet, shutting the door behind me.
I picked up the flashlight and flicked it on, then reached at the seal, which I had kept around my neck, ever since the first “encounter”.
In a rush, I aimed the light at the seal, studying the strange engravings.
This was the first time that I really inspected the marks on the charm. The engravings depicted two criss-crossing peacock feathers and four other symbols, which were made up of random shapes and lines.
“Come on, come on, what’s your name?” I whispered, shaking from the pressure and breathing heavily.
Almost dropping it from my unsteady hand, I flipped it over.
A row of ten small symbols were engraved on the back.
I couldn’t understand, at first. I can’t explain it, but I had no idea what these symbols were – and yet I could feel the word spelling out inside my brain, as if some piece of me understood the strange language.
I flicked off the flashlight, clung to the seal, squeezed my eyes shut, then whispered.
When I opened my eyes, I was in the dark realm, again.
“…………greetings, little one……….it has been a long time, has it not?………”
“I need to undergo the transformation. Finalize this little deal and form a contract with me, Adramelech.”
“………….you’ve managed to impress me, little one……I was expecting you to throw that seal away and never speak to me again……….very well, then, I will form the contract……..”
Suddenly, I saw him. He was surrounded by pure darkness, but his figure was easily visible. This creature had the head of a black mule; the body of a man; the legs of a mule; rotted, burnt-black arms; talons at the ends of his fingers; curved horns on his head; and the tail of a peacock. I was shocked to see the one thing we shared in common. Golden eyes.
The thing approached me, extending his black hand to me.
“………….well, little one?……Are you prepared to finalize our deal?….”
I was hesitant, knowing that I had to give up my soul to finish this, but I had to do it. For Kota.
Still rushed by the thought of Kota getting shot, I took his hand.
The engravings on the seal began glowing with a faint red light, and I shuddered as my skin began turning into a dark black, and my fingernails shifted and grew into scythe-like claws.
The fear was overwhelming, but still I clung to the demon’s hand – squeezing it, due to the growing pain of the transformation.
The pain was agony, and I could feel it growing and growing, getting worse with each of my strained breaths.
Suddenly, the pain stopped, the only trace being a bit of soreness here and there.
“………it has been done, your soul belongs to me……….you may use your ability as you please, but I ask you to use it wisely……….and remember that your eyes – the mark that many know only you have……………..they will only be concealed when in darkness………it would be unwise to step into the light while in this form…………………now, little one, welcome to the world of darkness……”
I began seeing that I had returned to the closet.
I looked down, and realized that my veins, which were easily visible through my pale skin, were pumping black fluid through my body. Pumping darkness; fueling me with shadows.
I got up, and knew what to do.
I went downstairs to find Kota, sitting on the couch with his head in his hands, appearing defeated.
“Where’s dad?” I asked.
“He went out for a drive. He probably won’t be back for a while.”
As I walked away, I smiled and thought about the sweet vengeance I was about to get.
“No. He won’t be back.”