Jane the Daughter

It all started on that cold, November day.

“Haven’t you heard?” Jane turned to Max who was staring at Jane intently. His green eyes stared her down as she set her coffee down. “Heard, what?” “The things that have been seen lately!” Jane chuckled as she patted her bestfriend’s head. “Sure Max… Sure. Let me guess… The monsters are under your bed again?”

Max sighed as he turned to her.

“No… All of the disappearances and stuff. We live in the middle of nowhere… Yet things are happening here as well.” Jane shrugged as she sketched in her sketchbook, ignoring what he was saying.

“Are you even listening, Jane?” “Totally…” Max sighed, covering her sketch book. “Hey!” “Just listen… For about five minutes… Please.”

Jane sighed. How could she resist those eyes? She sipped her coffee and shrugged. “Fine… Five minutes.”

Max’s eyes filled with glee as he opened up his phone. The glowing snow from outside sunk into the window, making the diner glow, almost.

Max continued to type and scroll when he turned to Jane. “Do you remember the story about that kid who set his house on fire?” Jane nodded. “Wasn’t his name, Toby?”

Max turned his phone to Jane to reveal a dark headed kid on the screen. “They say he killed his father… And his body was never found.” Jane sighed. “Probably because he was bullied… I mean… I would’ve been his friend if he lived here.”

Max sighed. “I have a theory… All of these people are going missing… And they are never to be seen again. What if there is an entity taking them and making them join a cult, or something?”

Jane rolled her eyes. “No… That wouldn’t be the case.” “Huh?”

She sighed as she looked out the window. “Well… You can’t make someone evil. If your theory is partly true, they weren’t forced to be crazy.” Max watched her intently as she twiddled her thumbs. “They were crazy and insane and THAT was why they were taken.”

Max let the silence kick in, before laughing. “What’s so funny?” “You’re a theorist now, aren’t you?” Jane shrugged. “Well… No, I’m an artist.” “Yet you’re always DRAWING conclusions.”

Jane rolled her eyes. “Funny… I should book you for a birthday party soon…” Suddenly a loud honk could be heard outside the diner. Jane didn’t even need to look outside… For she already knew what was coming to her.

“My dad is here…” “Bye Jane… I’ll see you tomorrow.” Jane grabbed her sketchbook and bag before walking out of the diner.

“Hanging around that commener boy again?” Her father stood tall in a black suit with the hair of a white stallion. He was the type of person who thought he was doing work… But really he just barked orders at his workers.

“Let’s just go home…”

Her father wore designer outfits when she wore striped sweaters. Her father bought himself his new wardrobe and decor, while Jane simply bought art supplies with her own money. She didn’t despise her father… She only wished he would change.

Why was her father so stubborn? David Flinn was the only big fish in their small pond. He ran a branch of stores and markets. He OWNED this town which he took pride in… Yet he never took pride in his own daughter.

“Hey… Dad.” “Yes?” Jane sighed as she looked down. “My birthday is in a couple of days…” David lifted his head as he turned to her. “It is?” “Yes… November 17th… Like every other year.” David sighed. “And why are we discussing this?”

Jane tightened her grip on her skirt. “I want… I want you to… Buy me something.” Before he turned her down, David’s instinct for image kicked in. With a big and fake smile he turned to her. “What would you like?” Tenshion grew until the car stopped at a red light. Jane simply growled and turned to him. “Your watch…”

Her heart stopped by her sudden action. “My… Rolex?” “The one that Mom would always wear! It’s all that I have left of her besides those dusty, old pictures that stay in the attic!” “ENOUGH!” Jane gasped as David turned to her with angry eyes.

She had never seen her father so angry in her life. His long white hair stood up as his blue eyes stared her down. “You shall never get this rolex, unless you take it off of my dead body! Until that happens… You shall never have your mother on your wrist!” You could see his vains in his neck as he turned back to the wheel… Trying to calm down.

Jane sighed as she looked away, almost on the urge of tears. “S-Sorry… That I asked…”

As Jane and David returned home, Jane opened the giant mansion doors to her home, shutting them forcefully with a loud bang. “Master Jane?” Turning, she saw her maid, Wilma, a 32 year old woman. “Are… Are you alright, Jane?” Jane sighed and nodded. “I’m fine, Wilma… Just a little disappointed.”

Before Wilma could say another word, Jane turned around and began to run up to her room, upstairs. “Master Jane!” Jane shut her door, quickly running over to her bed. ‘You never did anything for me… And I stood by it.’

She grabbed her laptop, putting on her headphones straight afterwords. ‘Why can’t I just have one thing from you?’  As she laid in her bed… Tears ran down her face as soft piano music whispered into her ears. ‘Just… One thing…’ With that… She drifted off to sleep.

Time passed. Jane slowly opened her eyes to the sound of knocking. “H… Hello?” Slowly lifting her head, she yawned, realizing it was 3am. “Wilma?”
The tapping continued… Yet it wasn’t from Jane’s door.

“The… Window?” Tap… Tap… The sound continued. Her hands began to shake as she turned toward the glass window. “Hello?” Jumping off of her bed, she took a step toward the window. Tap… Tap… The tapping continued.

She felt hesitant moving the curtains. With a hesitant and cautious motion, she grabbed the silk hanging over he window. ‘3… 2…’ Turning away, she moved the curtains from the window.

Since nothing jumped out or killed her, she turned back to the window. Looking out at the darkness… She could make out the shape of a tall figure in front of the mansion. The stare of the figure was overbearing… It called out to her. ‘Who… Is that?’

She turned to her window lock, opening the window. She shook her head out of the window. “Hey, what are you-” Suddenly… The figure was gone. ‘I could have sworn… I… I guess it’s just my imagination.’

Even after that… She fell asleep again on her bed. At some times in her life… She sometimes thinks that she’s going crazy. To be honest… She thought being crazy was a little bit of a good thing.

The next day, Jane walked downstairs. As she walked into the hallway, she saw Wilma carrying a load of laundry in a basket. “Wilma, I can take it.” “Master Jane, I got it.” Jane shook her head, taking the basket of white clothes from her hands. “I insist… Take some time for yourself.”

Wilma smiled as Jane began to walk away with the basket of clothes. “Remember, use bleach. They’re white clothes, master!” “I know!”

Jane’s footsteps could be heard across the halls as she carried the basket of clothes. As she entered the laundry room, she poured the clothes into the washer. The events of the day before rested in her mind still.

‘Why does he hate me? All I want is Mom’s watch. He’s had it on his wrist ever since Mom died…’ As she grabbed the jug of bleach, her fingers escaped its grasp. The jug fell, hitting the ground, spilling onto the floor. “Dang it!” She quickly picked up the jug and grabbed a towel on one of the shelves next to her.

“How can I be so clumsy?!” The strong smell of the liquid filled her scent as she began to clean up the bleach on the floor. “Grr… This is awful.” As she continued to scrub the floor… An idea suddenly hit her. “Maybe… Dad doesn’t want me to have Mom’s watch… Because he thinks I’m not worthy.” She smiled. “I just need to… Be more like him.”

She grabbed a strand of her hair and sighed. “I never liked my brunette color, anyway.”

The next day… Jane walked toward her father’s study. A weird and odd feeling took over her body as she walked. ‘Come to think of it… I haven’t been in Father’s study in years…’ The feeling stuck with her, for it felt like eyes were watching her every move.

She would be right…

Her anxiety kicked in as she held onto the door’s knobs. As she took a deep breath… She opened the large doors. “Father?” As the doors opened, the smell of a wooden fire filled her nose. The soft, ominous, candlelight filled her vision. A large library of books surrounded her, along with chairs, tables, and a black and white tiled floor.

In the center of the room, sat her father behind his desk. A brown book rested in between his fingers as he quietly hummed to himself. “Father?” David didn’t look away from his pages. “Yes, sweetheart?” Jane stuttered under her breath as she turned to him. “May… May we discuss Mom’s watch?” “Honey… Not this again.”

David lowered his book, gasping at what he saw. Jane’s brunette hair was gone from his sight. “Your hair…” Her hair hung over her shoulders… White as the moon. The whiteness of her haired shocked him, making him stand up. “What… What did you do to it?” “I bleached it… For you…” “Why on Earth would you bleach it? Your hair was beautiful as a brown color.”

Jane gripped onto her hand as the fireplace crackled. “I thought… If I looked like you… Or changed to be like you… Than you would accept me and give me Mother’s watch.”

David growled under his breath as he rested his hands on his desk. He stared into Jane’s hazel eyes… Yet he still felt no remorse for his doings. “I told you my finale answer.” He turned to her. “You will never get this watch unless you rip it off of my dead corpse.”

It felt like a stab in her heart. The fire continued to pop and crackle as her white glowed from the fire. “How…” She snapped. Stomping her foot against the ground, she turned to him with teary eyes. “WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT ME INTO YOUR LIFE?! HOW MUCH DO I NEED TO CHANGE FOR ME TO BE YOUR DAUGHTER?!”

Besides her loud yell… The world stayed quiet. David tightened his grip on his desk and growled. With his pure devil-like eyes… He growled… “No matter how much you change… No matter how much of your identity is alterered…” He lifted his head with his cold eyes, stabbing Jane in her very soul. “You will NEVER be… My daughter…”

Something inside her snapped. She held onto her skirt as she turned away. “Well Father… If that is how you want to play…” A tear rolled down her face as she growled. “I… I hope you burn in Hell…” With tears running down her face, she began to run toward her room.

‘Father…’ She slammed her door shut before running toward her bed. Her face fell into one of the pillows, sobbing her eyes out. ‘Father…’ The same filthy word echoed into her brain. ‘Father…’

A sudden feeling washed over her as she hugged her pillow. “Perhaps…” Jane smiled as she held onto her black pillow. “Father isn’t as tough as he believes…” A chuckle escaped her lips as it turned into a sadistic laugh. “Hehe… Hehahahhhahaa….. HAHAHAAHHHAHAHAHAH!!!!!”

A bloodlust formed inside of her as she ran toward the window. Opening the window, she stared into the darkness. “Hey! I know you’re out there!” She frantically searched for the figure from before. “Come out! I feel you! I know you’re out there!”

The figure didn’t show… But his presence still lingered inside of her. She scoffed as she shut her window. “Stubborn… Aren’t we?” She fell onto her bed and sighed. “He’ll see… Either way… I’m going to have the best birthday ever…” A giggle escaped her lips as she stared up at the ceiling. “The best birthday ever… Number 15…” She slowly closed… Smiling as she wandered into her trance.

November 17th… 9:37pm… The right time for the most wonderful of occasions. David held his book in his hands as the fire cracked and popped behind him. He sighed as the pages spoke to him in a whisper tone, that only he could hear.

As he sighed… Another voice whispered to him, which wasn’t his own. “Hello Father…” Lifting his head, he saw Jane and her white crystal hair. She was dressed different. She wore a black jacket with a red tank, black skirt, black and white striped stockings, and black boots. “Jane? What are you doing at this hour?”

Jane smiled as she walked up to him. “I just… Wanted to see you is all.” David sighed. “If you’re here to ask about the watch, you aren’t getting it, Jane.” “I’m here for more than the watch, Father.” Jane walked up toward his desk, standing in front of it. “Than… What are you here for?” Jane smiled… It made chills go down his spine.

“I’m here for you, Father.”

The fire continued to crack and pop. David smiled. “Well Jane, what do you want to talk ab-” A sensation took over his body. “I’m here for you… Traitor.” Looking down… David could see a knife in his chest. “J… Jan…” Falling to the ground… Jane grabbed the knife, taking it out of his chest.

“I’m keeping my promise!” Clenching the knife, she continued to stab him in the heart. “THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED!” Stab after stab… She smiled as blood splattered onto her face. “I’LL RIP IT OFF OF YOUR DEAD BODY!”

His dead expression filled her with glee as she stopped. “Isn’t this fun?! Isn’t this what you wanted!? THIS IS WHAT YOU ASKED FOR!” She was having so much fun… She forgot what she came for. Turning toward his wrist… She began to take off his black rolex.

“You never loved her… Did you?” She sighed as she stared at her father’s lifeless body. “Everyday… She would come home and lay me to bed. All you did was kiss her cheek. We played and danced in the halls while you stayed in your office… Doing nothing but calling people over the phone, complaining.”

Jane wrapped the rolex around her wrist. “The only reason why you held onto this watch… Was because you wanted everyone to believe you had something, besides your business, to live for. The truth is… You were nothing more than a clown in a circus… Putting on your makeup and act.”

She smiled… Before laughing hysterically as she stared down at his body. “Hehehe… Hehahahaha…HAHAHAHAHHHAHA!!!”

It felt so good to see him lay under her… Dead and cold. This truly was her greatest birthday present. Suddenly… A feeling rushed over her body. This feeling made her shake and tremble. “This… This feeling…” “Daughter…”

Jane stood up, turning toward the room’s entrance. “Who’s there?!” She quickly covered her mouth, realizing how loud she was. The feeling overtook her again. “Daughter…” She jumped forward as she felt a hand touch her shoulder. Turning around in a fright, her heart stopped.

“Daughter…” Looking up… The same tall figure from before entered her vision. Black, white, red… The very colors of him matched her. It’s hands… HIS hands were cold and sharp. His appearance haunted her in the moment. She couldn’t stare him down… For one simple reason.

This figure had no face.

Face or not… He smiled gently as he reached out his hand. “Daughter…” Was he really saying that? Was it all in her mind? Has she truly gone crazy to the point of no return? “D-Daughter?” The fire behind the figure cracked and popped as he smiled gently. “My… Daughter…”

Jane gasped slightly as the figure’s hand reached out toward her. “My… Father…” A tear rolled down Jane’s face as she reached out her hand. “Father…” As their hands touched… Jane smiled. “Father…” With his faceless top… He smiled with joy… “Yes… My daughter…” Now… Everything was forgotten on that day… Yet… only one person remembers these events.

The next day… Every reporter wanted to know… “Who killed David Flinn and how did his mansion burn to the ground?” Max gripped onto his pillow as he watched the TV. “His daughter is missing. David Flinn’s body was found burned, with obvious stabs to the heart. We believe his mansion burned down due to a lit fireplace.”

Max sighed as watched the report in front of his eyes. A tear ran down his face… Falling onto a book of pictures. “Jane… How could you?” His tear fell down the picture of him and Jane… Wasting perfectly good memories.

Jane Flinn was reported missing. The cops didn’t think a teenage girl could kill a healthy middle-aged man. Everyone advised the people to lock their doors, in fear that a serial killer was on the loose. What these people didn’t realize… Was  that the killer was one of them… And only her best friend knew the truth.

  • Jane Fox

    Ha, its my Creepy pasta, I get to type first. I am so glad that my story has made it this far, to my very first CreepyPasta. Thank you for reading ‘Jane the Daughter’, and you will be seeing more from me in the future.

    • Puddin Tane

      Your story was an interesting read. It needs a little cleaning up to make it better, but I did find it mostly enjoyable. Try reading it aloud to yourself, but slowly. It will help you find any errors that you may have made.

      • Jane Fox

        Thank you for your considerations. I am definitely doing that for a future project. Believe it or not… There is going to be a sequal. Look out for any CreepyPastas called “The Tracer”. Thank you for reading and good wishes.

  • Nooobi

    Cool story. Especially if you go back to the beginning after reading, noticing some things.

    • Jane Fox

      Thank you. Make sure to look out for a story called “The Tracer” in the future, the sequal to “The Daughter”, which will be a lot more action packed, psychotic, and disturbing. Thank you, and good wishes to you

  • oof the killer

    I loved this. Especially how you included Ticci Toby.

    • Jane Fox

      AND Slender, don’t forget Slender. Lol

    • Jane Fox

      Remember to keep a lookout for the sequal. “The Tracer” shall be coming out soon.

  • Ghostie

    Man, I haven’t read something this bad since Sonic.exe

  • Ellie Holt

    It’s decent. I wish Jane didn’t sigh so much or roll her eyes every couple of sentences. Maybe find something else Jane can do. 4/5.

  • Jane Fox