Dr. Scream

Hi I’m Alice, I have a number of health problems so I have to go to the hospital for a check-up once a week. I moved to Texas recently so I got a new doctor. He seemed nice, his name was Dr. Scream. His name is strange, it sounds like he is from a horror movie or something.

So I went to the hospital as usual but one day Dr. Scream said that my health problems were getting much worse and I should stay at the hospital for only a few days. My mom agreed. So the 1st night I heard a little girl singing. I thought it was another patient.

In the morning I found out that there was no little girl staying here. The 2nd night I heard and saw the little girl, I thought it was a side effect of one of my medicines. The 3rd night it happened again, this time I knew it was real because I didn’t take any medicine today I got scared and ran out of the room. I saw a nurse, I ran up to her to tell her about what I saw, but she was crying. I was going to ask her what was wrong, but the she ran and phased through the wall. I thought I was asleep, but wasn’t dreaming, I was sure of it. Then I turned around and there was a little boy. He said, “Don’t trust Dr.Scream, he killed us.” Then I ran for the exit, I didn’t want to find out if what he said was true. Then someone grabbed me and put one hand over my mouth and the other to grab me. Then he said, “Shhhh, go to sleep.” Then put a needle in my arm and I started to feel drowsy…

  • Jay 🤘💫💞

    Poorly written.

  • Rose Morrison

    Very short, very rushed. Is there more to come?

  • Mattillmattic

    “Then someone grabbed me, put one hand over my mouth and the other to grab me.” Uhmm

  • Jmay

    This is very poorly written. First of all, you need a good background development for why she went there and more details for the hospital. Details are critical in any story. Secondly, the diction and syntax is poorer than the average North Korean. Sentences are choppy, there’s not a lot of creep to get you worked up over what comes next. I can read the whole thing in almost 10 seconds and that’s not good.

  • Omega Flowey


  • IronMosquito

    Wow. Rushed, poorly written, no character development, the list goes on. This was pretty bad.